In a digital marketing course I took a few years back, one of the tutors told us that headlines featuring an odd number were more likely get a click than ones with an even number. I don't know if that's true, but I'm settling on the number nine. Seven is too symbolic and anything above or below is just too many or too few. This is a listicle, by the way.
So, here are the 9 listicles I would love to read:
1. Top 10 Beers for Boosting Your IQ
Let's face it...with the right research design, pretty much any correlation can be proven, so why not beer consumption and a temporary spike in intelligence? I'm putting my bet on Leffe. And any type of IPA, which has been known to transform the utterly thick into prolific geniuses for years now.
2. The 3 Hardest Cheeses to Cut
If you're hosting a party, you may want to serve a cheese platter, in which case, you probably want to know which cheeses to avoid because they are too hard to cut. Fondue definitely has to be on the list. Anytime you put a knife to it, it just oozes back together again. Uncuttable.
3. 4 Perfumes That Might Remind You of Your Grandma
Adulting is awfully hard and sometimes you just want to travel back to Grandma's vanity to play with her perfume bottles and Clinique gift samples. Indulge in a little aromatherapy with the top 4 most popular perfumes from 1950-1979. She didn't mess with that '80s shite.
4. 99 Reasons To Go Out And Buy Some Chocolate RIGHT NOW
You've been practicing radical self love for a while now, but everybody needs an ally. In comes this listicle outlining 99 tried and true reasons you deserve those M&M's, Kit Kat and Twix.
5. 20 Ways Being A Billionaire Actually Kinda Sucks
The sultana of silicone, Kylie Jenner, is allegedly about to hit the 10-figure mark. Yes, inequality is here to stay. So, wouldn't it be cool if one of the 'lucky ones' would relieve us of our envy by publishing a list of ways in which being a billionaire is actually a horrible drag? Wishful thinking, I know...
6. 18 Repurposes For Your Rare Ty Beanie Babies
We collected them because we thought they would make us rich one day. That day never came. There must be some way(s) to upcycle the adorable animal bean bags with their perfectly preserved tags!
7. 5 Dances They're Probably Doing on Other Planets
I'm pretty sure humans were dancing before we invented language, so doesn't it stand to reason that if we can anticipate the dance moves of an alien life form, it will give us a leg up (haha) if they ever decide to come pay us a visit here on Earth? This one will require GIFs.
8. 14 Mantras To Manifest A Seat On Public Transport
The difference that securing a seat during rush hour can make for your state of mind is staggering. With 14 mantras to manifest a spot to squat your derriere on the bus or train, one of them is bound to work...at some point.
9. 6 Steps To Write Like Thomas Wolfe
...or insert your favourite author here. There are so many books about the craft of writing but nobody puts it forward straight and simple like. Writers need clarity. We need it step-by-step. We need a listicle.
I hope you've enjoyed this listicle about listicles!
If you want to take one of these ideas and run with it, please be my guest, and let me know when it's finished so I can read it!